Russian Dead Can Sign Only Putin Petitions, Some Russians Claim Election Officials have Decided

Paul Goble

            Staunton, Feb. 3 – Russia’s Central Election Commission has stricken off the signatures of people known to be dead on petitions to register every presidential candidate except Vladimir Putin. As a result, some Russians are saying, in their country, the dead can thus sign only his petitions, one more reason why he has become irreplaceable.

            That is just one of the anecdotes in the latest collection offered by Moscow journalist Tatyana Pushkaryova (publizist.ru/blogs/115058/47689/-). Among the best of the rest are the following:

·       Recent events show that the penultimate ones were much better.

·       Tell the truth for just one day and by nightfall, you’ll be unemployed, cursed by everyone, and lying in a traumatology department of the local hospital.

·       Russians aren’t responding to what is happening in their country by doing nothing. Instead, they are lying down.

·       Russians shouldn’t be worried about problems with the Internet. The links will all remain: they just won’t be accessible.

·       Under Stalin, calling someone an enemy of the people was enough; but under Putin, some want to call those on the outs with the regime enemies of humanity or even enemies of the universe.

·       Calls for Russians to raid bookstores and confiscate books by foreign agents will likely soon be called by book burnings across the country. It isn’t enough to take books out of bookstores and libraries; it is necessary to make sure no one reads them.