Paul Goble
Staunton, Jan. 4 – So many Orthodox priests have been labelled foreign agents by the Russian government that the Moscow Patriarchate has been forced to point out that anyone baptized by one of these agents won’t inherit the kingdom of God unless they are re-baptized by another priest who isn’t a foreign agent, according to a new Russian anecdote.
That is just one of the jokes and stories collected by Moscow journalist Tatyana Pushkaryova (publizist.ru/blogs/107374/47472/300). Among the best of the rest are the following:
· Switzerland gets a new president every year. What a mess! Russians don’t want to live like the Swiss, do they?
· The Russian health ministry recommends that Russians not sober up until after the elections. That way they will find it easier to cope with the news.
· The Moscow Patriarchate has apologized for the images of Christ on the cross which show him nearly naked.
· Russian men should stop worrying about the price of diamonds or the impact of sanctions on the Russian marketplace. Instead, they should give Russian women something rarer and more valuable: love and sobriety.
· Belarusian dictator Alyaksandr Lukashenka has issued a law saying that he and his family can’t be tried for any crimes after he leaves office, a remarkable sign of his trust in the power of law, something he is not noted for, and of his lack of trust in the love of his population.
· Every missile is destroyed when it hits the target, the Russian defense ministry has confirmed.
· Almost 300 years ago, a Russian peasant invented the first steam-driven computer; but during testing, the horses rotating the drive were frightened and bolted so no one learned about it.
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