Saturday, September 17, 2022

In Response to Expulsion of Russian Diplomats, Putin has Decided to Punish Western Ones by Keeping Them in Russia, Some Muscovites Say

Paul Goble

            Staunton, Sept. 2 – Vladimir Putin has come up with his latest asymmetrical response to the West, some Muscovites say. Instead of a tit-for-tat expulsion of diplomats from Western countries which have expelled Russian ones, the Kremlin leader has decided to punish these Western diplomats by keeping them right where they are -- in Moscow.

            This is one of the anecdotes in the latest collection assembled by Moscow journalist Natalya Pushkaryova ( Among the best of the rest are the following:

·       Putin says he still doesn’t have a cell phone. Clearly, he is spending all his money to outfit the bunker.

·       Given how bad things are in Russia and how threatening all the countries are around it, Russian schools are going to offer new course on how to live in caves and make fires to make sure the young are ready for the future.

·       Reports that Chubais has recovered have prompted the Kremlin to declare a national day of mourning.

·       Kremlin propagandists dream of a means by which anyone will be convinced of their ideas as easily as taking a patriot pill, something it is reported specialists at Skolkovo are now working hard to develop. Take one and you will agree in advance with anything Putin says.

·       Russia has thwarted the criminal plans of the Kyiv junta to kill off all Ukrainians in an act of genocide. Of course, the way Russia has done so is by depriving the junta of the object of its planned genocide by destroying it first.

·       Rossiiskaya pravda says the energy crisis in Europe is so bad that soon the English will have to limit their use of power. Russians are advised that they must subscribe to that publication before 12/22/22 because on that date Russians who don’t do that will have their electricity and water turned off forever.

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