Monday, June 12, 2023

Kyiv Couldn’t Deprive Crimea of Water but Moscow Could and Has, Russians Say

Paul Goble

            Staunton, June 10 – When Putin occupied Ukraine’s Crimea in 2014, his officials uttered the prophetic words that Kyiv will never be able to deprive the peninsula of water. They were right: Kyiv couldn’t. But now Moscow by blowing up the Kakhovka dam have achieved that end, Russians observe.

            This is only one of the anecdotes Russians are telling each other that have been collected by Moscow journalist Tatyana Pushkaryova ( Among the best of the rest are the following:

·       RT head Margarita Simonyan has proposed ending the military conflict and holding referendums in the disputed territories as to which country they’d like to be part of. Unfortunately for Moscow, the first such vote would likely be held in Belgorod Oblast, up to now a part of the Russian Federation.

·       Journalists should stop pestering the Kremlin as to whether Putin is going to run again in 2024. When he decides to make an announcement, his minions not only will report that fact but also what percentage of the vote he will receive down to one tenths of a percentage point.

·       Despite bombings and other violence, Russians still can’t figure out why the evil Ukrainians still hate them.

·       The same people who said Moscow would take Kyiv in three days are now saying the Russian economy will rebound to pre-crisis levels in 2024. But Russians say it is worth believing the latter as that will give at least a few minutes of hope.

·       Some say that Russians should protest when other Russians are arrested. But that is a mistake: those who don’t protest the arrest of others can count on at least a few more days before they themselves are. In Putin’s Russia, silence is best strategy Russians can adopt.  

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