.People Whose Presidents are Always Right Live Less Well than Those where Leaders are to Blame for Everything, Russians Say

Paul Goble

            Staunton, July 25 – According to the latest anecdote circulating in Moscow, Russians have taken note of the fact that people like themselves who live in countries whose leaders like Putin are always right for some reason of other nonetheless live less well than do those in countries where the leaders are to blame for everything.

            That is just one of the popular observations assembled by Moscow journalist Tatyana Pushkaryova in her latest collection (publizist.ru/blogs/107374/43494/-). Among the best of the rest are the following:

·       A new Duma bill will create special public councils for television, theater and cinema to prevent any works promoting non-traditional sexual relations. These councils supposedly will include priests to anathematize those who do; and security officials who will flog them or in some cases put them in prison.

·       Putin and Lavrov are now meeting only with world leaders who have been in power a long time, at least 30 years. This shows that Russia isn’t isolated but is well received by long-serving dictators like the heads of Iran, the Congo and Uganda.

·       Now that the Russian army has suspended utility bills in parts of Ukraine it has “liberated,” Russians say they are hopeful that the Russian military will come home, liberate them and end their utility bills as well.

·       The Kremlin has eliminated tariffs on goods imported from Afghanistan. That means that poppy seeds for buns will suddenly become much cheaper.

·       China has stopped working with Russia on creating a new passenger jet because the Russian side has shown itself capable only of building walls around the palaces of the oligarchs.

·       The solution to Russia’s economic difficulties is to insist that Russian officials have as many children as possible given how well such people always do.

·       Some rich Russians are complaining that they can’t visit their families living abroad because of sanctions. For some reason, it never occurs to them to suggest that their families should visit them in Russia.