Russian Army in Ukraine Regrouping but Kyiv’s Forces ‘Shamefully’ Pursuing It, Muscovites are Saying

Paul Goble

            Staunton, Sept. 27 – An anecdote circulating in Moscow shows that many Russians fully understand that the Kremlin’s talk about “regrouping” is only another word for “retreat” and a forced retreat at that, given that wits say Ukrainian forces are “shamefully” pursuing Russian troops as they “regroup.”

            That is just one of the new Russian jokes and anecdotes Moscow journalist Tatyana Pushkaryova offers in her latest collection (publizist.ru/blogs/107374/43891/-). Among the best of the rest are the following:

·       Moscow outlets now saying that Europe will freeze this winter and that Russia is dealing well with sanctions are the same ones who said earlier that Ukraine would be defeated in two days and that Ukrainians were waiting for the Russian army with flowers.

·       A concert in Izyum entitled ‘Russia will be here forever!’ had to be cancelled when the Russian army fled the city as Ukrainian forces advanced.

·       Putin is a hero for the tourism business in Turkey, Egypt and Greece. Thanks to his work, those are the only countries Russians can go to easily. It is entirely possible that pictures of the Russian president will soon go up in travel companies in these three.

·       Senator Elena Mizulina explained one Russian regrouping by suggesting that “the Ukrainian army took our soldiers by surprise because they were mourning the death of the queen of England.

·       Russia is going to achieve all its goals in Ukraine, the Kremlin says; but now it uses the future imperfective rather than the present or past.

·       Given the success of the Russian army in demilitarizing Ukraine, the governor of Russia’s Belgorod Oblast says that residents should use the basements of buildings there as bomb shelters.

·       Russian legislators are considering requiring large families to send their children to military training en masse given how much cannon fodder the state needs.

·       Another sign of who is going to win the war: members of the Russian elite are now buying Ukrainian patterned clothing and practicing speaking with at least a Ukrainian accent.